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…and out spouts a mediocre poem without a title, because titles mean the work has reached a state of completion

backspace-

my friend and nemesis

in the same stroke.

my fingers tapping

across the keys,

words unspoken

by lips, teeth and tongue.

confessed by fingers

tap, tap, tapping.

backspace-

until each letter

is deleted.

leaving nothing

but a blank screen

and a full mind.

backspace-

leaves the truth

trapped

until my heart

stops beating.

hearts

don’t come installed

with buttons

magic enough

to erase thoughts.

So I may have gotten a  little lot behind in my whole blogging every day in November promise to myself. At first I was going to call it an utter failure, but that’s not exactly the case. I thought about what I would write every single day, but by the time I had a few minutes to spare I chose sleep. Ask my husband, I keep falling asleep way early…on the couch nonetheless. I had a catch up blog half written, and then my youngest got a stomach bug…for four whole days. That sure put a damper on my entire Thanksgiving break, although I did get a ton of extra snuggles from Miss Piper Poozle. It won’t be long before she doesn’t need me as much, and the snuggles subside. That will make Porky the Puggle happy, as he gets very jealous when it’s not his turn for a spot on my lap. In the end, I would rather break a promise to myself than disappoint my girlies. After all, they will forever be my favorites.

That’s a mouthful, but I promise it will soon make sense… So I may have failed just a little at the whole posting daily for a month deal. I promise it was for a really good reason! I was on call for my job  Monday night, and that sucked the life out of me. Then there’s yesterday…I got a wisdom tooth pulled. I won’t complain about the number of work related texts/phone calls I received while I was at the dentist. Yes, I complained when I was medicated, but today I’m thinking positively. So my positive spin is that at least my coworkers value my opinion, and want me included in what’s going on. Yup.

Oh, or maybe they can’t survive a day without me? Nope, that one’s probably a stretch.

So here goes three days worth of thankful posts all rolled into one little blog entry

November 5, 2012

I’m thankful for freedom of speech. Who knew that all the ‘thankful for’ facebook posts would get so many  panties in a bunch.  Are people so used to negative all the time that they can’t handle anything positive? I heard three different coworkers complain about wanting to vomit because of said posts. Your tendency towards vomiting at a thoughtful, thankful post will not deter me!

November 6, 2012

I’m thankful for the right to vote! I take my daughters with me when I vote. I’m hoping this expresses how important it is to be educated on the candidates, and to do their part by voting. You can’t complain if you don’t cast your vote for a change! There’s nothing wrong with having an educated opinion at a young age. My Zoe is very upset that she will turn 18 a month after the presidential election of 2020, thus making her ineligible for voting that year. She thinks that your vote should count if you will turn 18 prior to the end of the year that the election takes place.

I’m also thankful for dental insurance. Seriously, I know so many people who don’t have dental coverage. I didn’t exactly enjoy having a wisdom tooth pulled, but it needed done. I have the NICEST dentist ever-Dr. Joshua Renken at Renken Dentistry. He always asks about my kids, and remembers specific things about them. Definitely a family oriented provider who is finally an in network provider for our dental insurance.

November 7, 2012

I’m thankful for the tooth fairy. All joking aside, I asked the tooth fairy for a new purse, and she agreed that a wisdom tooth extraction warranted such an exchange. My six year old hasn’t lost any teeth yet, so I imagine she’ll expect something pretty spectacular for her first baby tooth. For now, I’ll tuck my wings away until her wiggly teeth finally make their way under her pillow. I don’t plan on any more teeth extractions for myself. I still have two wisdom teeth, but they are staying right where they are!

There’s something about Sundays that hints at the promise of something new, something fresh. It’s usually a family day at my house, complete with a healthy home cooked meal. I like to try new recipes on Sundays, because I can generally take the time to somewhat follow a recipe. If you know me at all, you know that I don’t exactly like to follow directions, specifically when it comes to cooking. I much prefer making it up as I go along.  Today’s recipe is a spin on broccoli cheese soup of sorts…weight watcher friendly of course.

November 4, 2012

I’m thankful for the chance to have a fresh start. I’ve been in a slump with my self-care lately. I know I’m quite capable of achieving my goals, I’ve done it before. I woke up today knowing that today is the day!

I will get back on track!

It was a bit frosty outside, so I jogged in place in my living room for twenty minutes. It’s not much, but it’s the first step towards my fresh start. My hope is that I’m teaching my daughters that there will be times when you stumble, but there is always the promise of a fresh start to keep you going. Sometimes it just takes a little while to get the confidence to try again. It’s never too late to make a change.

they call me mommy

November 3, 2012

they call me mommy, and sometimes they call me Momma Chase, or the boss…

There aren’t strong enough words in the human language to describe just how thankful I am to be called mommy. My two precious gifts are Zoe Anastasia and Piper Jean. Not only are they beautiful and talented in my eyes, but they possess the confidence to shine bright enough for others to see as well.

Just last week I was at their school for Girls on the Run (I’m a running buddy for my oldest,) and one of the volunteer grandparents stopped me in the hallway  to let me know what wonderful children I have. I’ll admit that I’m still riding that wave of pride.

I’m not saying that my children are perfect, nor do I want them to go around thinking they are without faults. My job is to simply guide them on the right path, and protect them at all costs. Part of being a parent is putting your children before all others, even yourself. You must also teach them to learn from their mistakes, and how to right their wrongs. Putting them on a pedestal and sweeping their wrongs under the rug instead of addressing them does nothing for their character. I feel like I’m lecturing, but its something I feel strongly about. This momma is going to take a deep breath and move forward.

I wouldn’t trade being called mommy for anything in the world, not even coffee or reeses peanut butter cups.  I’m super lucky to get to be a ballet mom, soccer mom, girls on the run mom, IMSA mom, Girl Scout mom, and room mom.  Sure, I’m proud of my girlies for being involved in so many great things, but at the end of the day I’m just happy that they still call me mommy, and want to share their lives with me.

the love of a good book

November 2, 2012

I’m thankful for not only the ability to read, but  also the magic that happens when I wrap myself so completely in a book that I become lost within the lives of  characters. I wish that everyone could know what its like to have a love for reading, and it makes me sad that others don’t have the same relationship with books that I do.

I’m thankful that my Zoe has an insatiable hunger for reading, and can have meaningful conversations about what she reads. I smile when she laughs out loud at something she has just read, and provide comfort when a beloved character brings tears to her eyes.  She rereads her favorite books until the pages begin to fall out.

I’m thankful that Piper is able to read me stories at bedtime, but still wants to snuggle up and let me be the storyteller as well. I get teary eyed when she reads through a page of a  chapter book without stumbling over any big words. I’m especially thankful that my six year old has her own method of analyzing and predicting what will happen next.

I am hopeful that those who don’t like to read just haven’t met the right book yet. I have an entire rubbermaid

tote of books that are looking for a good home.

I’d love to share one of my favorites with you🙂

I would like to capture this moment in time, hold it captive and claim it for myself. Wait a second, I suppose I could share it with you. There have been too many times over the past couple of months where my hands have ached to pound away at the keyboard, but obligations and responsibilities have prevented me from doing so. Court reports and client case notes leave little room for creativity to blossom.

My friend Floyd asked me if I was still writing, and it made me feel physically ill to tell him that I wasn’t. In fact, I had to confess that I wasn’t getting my lazy butt out of bed to run either. I get into the bad habit of promising myself that tomorrow will be the day I will run. Tomorrow will be the day I track my weight watcher points again, TOMORROW I will blog a little, edit a little, let myself breathe a little.

Enough digression! I commit to making a very good attempt at blogging every day in November to get myself back in the habit of writing. The holiday season is upon us, and it’s important to remember all the positive in our lives.

November 1, 2012

I am thankful to spend so much time with others. It’s hard to be lonely when you have an amazing family (complete with a puggle who barks at you to get the laptop off your lap so he can snuggle), talented and entertaining friends old and new, and a job where I can give of myself to others.

There is truly a positive spin to everything, you just have to approach things from a different angle🙂

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