what do you do with a waterfall of tears?

 I hate that I keep focusing on heartbreak, but that seems to be the resounding theme in both my writing and the lives of several people I hold dear to my heart. Speaking of hearts (blah, I feel like such a girl)…

My heart hurts when someone I care about is in physical pain. The fortunate thing is that  physical ailments can oftentimes be alleviated or cured with medication.

My heart hurts even worse when those I love are facing a pain that can’t be mended so easily.  It’s hard to craft the perfect words of comfort  for someone with a waterfall of tears streaming down their face. You can offer an embrace, though your arms will never provide the comfort of the arms they long for. You can listen to what they have to say, or sit in silence with them when they can’t get the words to leave their tongue. Regardless of what small comforts you can offer, I think that just reassuring them that you will be there for them no matter what the outcome is the best thing you can do.

To my dear friend, today may feel like your world has fallen down around you, and there’s a good chance that tomorrow will be one hundred times worse. It has to get worse before it can get better, right? There will be a void; an emptiness that feels like it go on forever. You can try to fill that void with food, alcohol, prescription drugs (I prefer chocolate, vodka and xanax). You may be tempted to fill it with another person, convince yourself that’s what you need to get back on your feet, to be whole again.

I also suggest loud music, preferably Kelly Clarkson, The Fray, and Adele, but that’s not really your style. I’ll listen to it for you and report back how much better it made me feel.

I know several people who would line up to help you with a bit of playful vengeance should you venture down that path, but I think you care too much to be mean. Once the burn isn’t so strong, you may feel differently, and we’ll be here still, waiting in the wings for you. Whichever method you use to grieve, please stay true to yourself. Don’t compromise who you are because of how someone else has made you feel. You are strong, you are beautiful, and you are worth the time it’s going to take to heal.

You also need to remember that it’s ok to cry. I personally hate it when I let myself cry.  I hate to appear weak, hate to let someone know that they were able to get under my skin in such a way. I think we can both agree to remind each other of  one very important thing- people cry not because they are weak, but because they have been strong for too long.

So what do you do with a waterfall of tears? You let them fall.

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without love there would be no heartbreak

I try my best to be positive most of the time because there’s already enough negativity floating around the atmosphere. I hope that my little bits of positivity cancel out the negative, and at the very least make my own surroundings neutral.  Yesterday’s post on heartbreak left me feeling a little guilty and pessimistic. (I’ll save that silly guilt complex as the topic for another day)

Perhaps I should have mentioned  that without love there would be no heartbreak. Love is a positive thing, right?  One of my good friends recently reminded me that it’s better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. True story! Loving someone can reveal things about yourself that you wouldn’t have discovered otherwise. Loving someone can change  how you see the world. Loving someone can make you angry. Loving someone can consume your entire being. Loving someone can….blah blah blah blah. I really could go on and on.

There are so many types of love to describe because human beings have an awe-inspiring capacity to love in so many different ways. For example, my love as a mother to my daughters is the most beautiful love I could imagine. It’s a love that started at conception, and grew as their tiny bodies grew within my own. According to my girls, they chose me to be their mother, and I’d like to imagine this is true. This love as a mother is gentle, yet fierce in the same breath. Their pain is my pain, and their joy is my joy. My love for the clients I work with is one born out of empathy, but strong and true nonetheless.

My MC  in Free Fall has found that she can love and hate the same person just as equally. Charlie hates ****** (still haven’t picked a name I like) because the love she feels for him is a reckless love, an all-consuming love. She didn’t seek out these feelings, they just sort of  forced themselves into existence. She tried to convince herself that it was a bad case of lust causing her knees to turn to jelly; just a mind game causing the synapses of her brain to sizzle in response to the idea of him, not the flesh and blood him.

The hardest part of  Charlie’s love/hate is that it’s unrequited. That makes the heartbreak cut deeper,   nicking  her soul. This intrusive pain pisses her off, adding fuel to a fire that she never wanted in the first place. Although she may not have asked for this love, she can’t get rid of it. She’s addicted;  hooked on it. You can play the song below for a pretty clear picture of how she’s feeling.

The real question Charlie and even people in the nonfiction world have to face is…

Is loving worth getting your heart broken? The verdict is still out for Charlie, but what about you?

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What Does Heartbreak Feel Like?

To put it blatantly, life sucks sometimes. People can hurt you with words or actions. Sometimes words left unsaid burn more than those that ever cross a person’s lips. Heartbreak can come out of nowhere and destroy your entire life before you even realize something’s amiss. Your heart may not literally break into pieces, but it sure as hell feels that way.

Life is full of disappointments that lead to the feeling of heartbreak. There’s heartbreak in failure, death, love, etc. I’m working on describing how my current MC’s heartbreak feels. This is what I have so far…

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This persistent ache beneath my breast is new. There are a thousand knifes cutting away the only part of me that has ever felt truly alive. It’s an ache so severe that it has spread like wildfire, leaving my soul charred and quaking in its wake. I keep trying to swallow the shattered pieces that have lodged themselves in my throat, but nothing brings relief. No romance novel ever warned me that you could literally choke on heartache.

Perhaps this is what it feels like before someone dies of a broken heart. I’ll have to google that later. Strike that, Web MD is a better choice. Google isn’t quite safe yet, it reminds me of him. Ouch. Make that one thousand and one knives.

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That is one fictional character’s take on what it feels like to have your heart broken in a romantic relationship. I’m curious as to what heartbreak feels like to you. Please share!

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